LESSONS FROM YOUR 17TH YEAR 💰🚗

🎓 “Ladies and gentlemen of the class of ‘99… WEAR SUNSCREEN” 🎶

I wish we’d all been listening to the wisdom in this @bazlurhmann tune ⤴️ a little closer 🥺

I blame raging hormones and the far more emotionally in-tune anthems of the Backstreet Boys 🤦🏼‍♀️

SUCH a bittersweet time 🥲

This lovely gang will disperse soon to a variety of next chapters. You can hopefully all keep in touch with your Nokia 6110’s between endless games of Snake 😵‍💫

Now, about these eyebrows…

Ironically, two of your girlfriends are off to the London College of Fashion to study make-up. They’re obviously far too polite to suggest a pair of tweezers might be a good investment?

Certainly a better one than the massively overpriced brands you seem to enjoy purchasing on regular visits to JD Sports? At least there’s the added benefit of acquiring a collection of stylish, drawstring carrier bags to use for your PE kit 👌🏼

Time to start working (legally), ie payslips and minimum wage. I am very proud of your work ethic too here Ames 👏🏼

🎓 When you REALLY want something – trust that nothing will stop you getting it. You’re absolutely fine with not having a flash car. You’re very clear on your goal being freedom and independence – something that will stick and serve you later 🎯

The next two summers are spent working every hour under the sun, frying fish & chips and serving ice creams and donuts at the local theme park – you smell a treat after every shift 😷

Winters are spent at Gap and First Sport – a poor mans JD with inferior bags but an epic discount on those Reebok Classics 👟

Nailed that savings goal – a Ford Fiesta we call Trudy. She costs a princely sum of £750 and is sitting proudly on the driveway in time for your first lesson – in a car park – on your 17th birthday. You’re hungover for this lesson… what a start 🤨

🎓 Crushed your GSCEs – no need to have been so worried. It might take a few years to realise, but your best results are leaving clues 📝

Despite the eyebrows, you manage to acquire your first proper boyfriend – that theme park provides quite the supply of boys for you and your dancing friends! 😈🤣